Two Month Review

As of yesterday I have been here in Boise for 2 months. I had to look over my blog to remember what I did over the last month and thank goodness for the blog, because I really did not think that I did much this month. The blog has been useful in so many ways.

On the practical side, I got my Idaho driver's license, Idaho car registration and plates, and I registered to vote and voted. I finished another painting and 2 more studies, bought a tripod, and photographed the work that I completed since I've been here. I took most of the steps for my business, applied for a fictitious business name, got an EIN number, registered my business in Idaho, and applied for a sales and use tax permit and account number. (I was going to get a painting framed and then remembered I need the use tax permit to exempt the sales tax on the framing, since the painting is for resale, so I applied this week. One step at a time.) I finished my painting website. I almost finished a business plan. I joined the Museum of Southern Idaho, so I can participate in their holiday ArtMART, if I want. I found a local gallery and now have two paintings for sale there.

I should clarify the series of events with the Eagle gallery owner and my website. I called the gallery and she asked if I had a website and asked me to send her the link when I had one. I sent her an email with some samples of my work. I started and finished the website. Before I could send her the link to my site, she looked at my samples and sent me an email praising my work and asking me to come in and bring a painting. I sent samples on Tuesday and she did not respond until Friday, just as I finally got my site posted. Looking back now, I can understand why she wanted to see a website, she must have wanna be artists call all the time and I am glad I finally got that darn thing done, even if it is done in Flash and not HTML5.

In the last month I was rejected for the 2nd job I applied for and applied for a bunch more (I honestly don't know how many and I think I better start some kind of log to keep track) with both the State and private companies. I began researching holiday part time jobs and mentally preparing myself (in other words, humbling myself) to apply for one, although I have not actually applied yet.

Sometimes I forget that I am not still in Simi Valley and sometimes I feel like I have been here in Boise for a long time. Both my neighbor, Sarah, and my friend Mary Kay feel like people I have known for years. That is the part that feels hugely different this month, my ability to meet new people, make new friends, and also my ability to keep moving forward.

When I look back on the times in my life that were difficult, or where my life changed dramatically, I always seem to have been frozen and unable to move forward or take any action. When I returned from New York City I played Solitaire all the time until I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. When I got divorced, I drank wine and smoked cigarettes and looked out the window most of the time. I can't even begin to describe how I handled getting fired from my last video game job. That was such a dark time in my life. I was much better by the time I lost my house, and much more constructive, but I still often lost myself in home improvement and Sudoku.

One of the best things about being here in a completely new environment is that I get to see every day how much I've changed. I get to be myself with people who don't know what I used to be like. Every day I think, look at me being friendly, look at me meeting new people as if I am good at it, look at me talking in front of strangers, look at me readily saying yes to an invitation to meet for coffee or come over and watch the BSU game, look at me calling someone I don't know. There is still that moment where I hesitate, where I think of the reason to say no, but it is just a moment.

Over the last month there have been many times where I wasn't sure what to do next and got overwhelmed. In response, sometimes I was not very constructive, and my cold this week is really slowing me down, but mostly today when I'm not sure what to do next, I paint. I've spent so much time not painting because I thought that there was something more important that I should be doing. Today I just go ahead and paint and let whatever the next thing I should be doing reveal itself.

I am still worried about money and having an income, but that worry is not disabling. I think I made some progress on my goal from last month, which was to be more disciplined, to paint more and take more forward steps and to worry less. I think I will keep that goal for next month, and add the goal to find some kind of income, and to start that children's book.

My friend once said opportunity will come, you just have to be ready.